#2 it happened, it all f&@king happened
Warning- it’s a real long one, the beginning of who I am to become.
it was October 24th 2013, a Thursday morning, I woke to head to work on a friends farm for a long day of sheep work. it was hot , it was dusty but I knew hard work, I loved getting in, hands on and was always up for a challenge, getting down and getting dirty , all hands on deck!
Farm work finished around 5:30pm , I went home for a shower, a bite to eat and then the transformation begun from a dusty farm gal to a glitzy night club bar tender all in record time so I could jump in my moss green $300 1987 Mazda turbo shit box that ran off the smell of an oily rag For the 1.5 hour drive to canberra to start my second job, an 8 hr shift serving drinks to party goers in a night club, it was FUN, I loved it.
i finished work around 4:30am on the Friday morning jumped in my car drove to my boyfriends house at the time, near harden/wombat, had a coffee and we both headed off into young for the regular 1hr Friday morning Pt session.
so many times I’d ran out of fuel because the gauge didn’t work or I’d blow a tyre coming into young, we would have to run to PT and deal with the car later. When I say shit box I mean SHIT BOX but it was mine it got me from A to B most of the time. Haha
(Mind you this Same car once locked me inside of it , I had the keys and everything, but couldn’t get out, maybe that was a sign, who knows 🤣🤣)
anyway Pt finished up and i headed out to a friends farm chipping Bathurst burr with an old wooden hoe for the day, 5:30pm come around before I knew it and it was time to take the work shirt off and swap it for something a little more ‘Canberra city centre style’ for yet another 8 hour night club shift, my last shift for 2 days (or so I thought).
i had the best shift, the DJs were pumping, the party goers were kind and respectful and I knew I was going to get some sleep at a mates place in Canberra before a full day on Saturday at the annual Harden picnic races.
i rocked up At 4:45am Saturday morning to Matt and Sarah’s house (Matt’s parents house) I called Matt, I called Sarah , no answer (of course not it was 4:45am on a Saturday morning what was I thinking) And one thing was for sure, I was NOT ringing the door bell to have big Wazz (Matt’s dad) rock up half asleep in his jocks To the front door hahaha so I curled up on a seat on their front porch and tried to sleep , it eluded me, I was so pumped for a day off with my mates.
eventually they let me in and it was all systems go to get glam for the races, I was the sober driver for the day, the energy was high I didn’t feel like I hadn’t slept in 2 nights . So LETS GOOOOOO ,we had 2hrs (roughly) in the car of laughs and loud music, THE BEST kind of car trip, The Harden picnic races were a hoot , everyone was drunk, sun burnt, wind swept, having fun and ready to party by the end of the day, I dropped my bfs mum home, he was heading out and my mates were heading to bed or heading out also.
I was free , I had no more drop offs to do, no more work, the perfect time to head home to bed , until, I got the text I then made the call.
text from my boss:
Hi Sam, we are short staffed tonight, can you work a shift, I’ll pay you double. If you don’t , you don’t have a job. ( I still have this text on my laptop to look back on)
I was 20 years old and needed that bloody job, I wasn’t doing anything else Everyone was drunk so I thought fuck it , why not. “See you soon you old cranky bastard”, I said my goodbyes, clicked my seatbelt and off I went....
Guys it was THE MOST AMAZING NIGHT, a Sudanese night at the night club, they got in this amazing DJ, they danced like no one I’ve ever seen , made me feel like the most beautiful women in the world , I was in awe of their beauty, still to this day it is the best night I’ve ever had in a club hands down!!
4:30am come around I washed my hands , got my pay slip , grabbed my bag and danced my way to my beautiful shit box, I wasn’t sure if I had enough fuel so I drove to Gold creek servo and fuelled up (I definitely needed fuel, I always needed fuel) I grabbed a salad wrap, a bottle of water and a brand new flavour of a ‘fizzer’ a lolly that I just had to try. I left and was on route to put my head on a pillow.
I never made it.............
15 kms down the Barton highway From gold creek servo Just as the white fence of ‘Capricorn Stud’ finishes, IT HAPPENED , I’d fallen asleep, my car had flipped up a bank and through what looks like a big pool fence on the opposite side of the road at around 5:15am Sunday morning, the 27th of October.
3 nights of no sleep, running purely off adrenaline, love and drive, my bodies need for slumber caught up with me.......
now you’d think that’d be it! Any kind of car accident isn’t a good one but in my case that certainly wasn’t it............... I was found by some passers by , 2 nurses and maybe a builder? How bloody lucky am I! somehow I’d managed to get myself out of the car to where they had found me, emergency services were called and we were soon on route under lights to Canberra hospital, back along the Barton highway were I’d just come from and then IT HAPPENED AGAIN!
The Ambulance I was being transported in crashed on the Barton highway, I wasn’t secured properly and I was projected forward at speed and squashed from the top of my head down.
WHAT THE FUCK!
now thankfully for the last 6 years, yep 6 whole years The only thing I remember is leaving gold creek servo with a fizzer in my hand, I say thankfully , purely for the fact that I have not experienced a bad dream or bad memory regarding the crashes.
It’s crazy, but probably the craziest part of it all is having to off load this exact story to about 7000 different people over these past years only knowing what I’ve been told by those involved or by emergency service personnel.
So I guess In short I was involved in 2 serious car accidents within 45 minutes on the same stretch of road within 15 or so kms of each other in 2 different states both fatigue related. Both ‘ accidents’ involved fatigue and BOTH could have been prevented.
Am I bitter?..... no!!! Do emergency service men and women get pushed to their absolute physical and mental limits?..... YES!
should there be something done about that?.... you betchya!
Fortunately I survived!
Unfortunately I was quite a bit worse off. I sustained brain stem and C spine injuries and have been left with ‘Complete spastic Hemiplegia’. Or in laymen’s terms, Complete right side paralysis from pretty well my trapezius muscle down to my toe on my right side, this affects sooooo much of my body not just that right side. I get numbness down my left calf and foot (my good side) , down my left arm and into my pinky and ring finger (also my good side), I have had a constant headache for 6 years and 5 days, I have absolutely no sensation to touch, to temperature or spacial awareness on my right side, I have no movement other than some pretty hectic spasms on my right side, I have troubles with my bowel and bladder , my body temperature 🤒 , my right arm and the back of my knee have All contracted (Tightened) pretty badly, requiring surgery.
But I survived and that’s what really mattered.
My accidents do not define who I am nor are they my entire story, they are just part of, a bump in the road of who i was destined to become.
looking back now would I have done things differently...? YES absolutely, YES.
I’d erase my pain , I’d erase the pain caused to all my family and friends, I would SLEEP, I would say no, I would look after myself , I would of stayed and gone out partying with my partner at the time. But the reality is I can’t and I didn’t, I can’t erase time , I can’t take it all back I couldn’t have ever controlled the situation in that ambulance.
I am where I am right now because right here is where I am supposed to be.
what happened happened, it couldn’t have happened any other way because it didn’t!
Readers.... I’ll tell you all one thing, I’m not one bit who I used to be, I’m not quite who I am supposed to be but I’m working hard and I’ll get there.
October 27th 2013 flipped my world on its head, it crushed ‘almost’ every little piece inside of me. From that day on I had to attempt my hardest job yet, healing, staying strong, rehabilitating my body, upholding relationships, not breaking down. I had to keep my anger at the situation under control, I had to rebuild my life , my dreams of a career in the defence force were over, I felt like I had to keep everyone around me happy and entertained, all while having no fucking idea what was going on with my body!
I was flat on my back for weeks, you name it, it was getting pumped into my body , the pain was excruciating, I barely ate, I couldn’t, but I craved Starburst lollies (they made me happy) and was lucky enough to have a partner up keeping my stock pile and keeping my head straight all while having serval people unhappy or unaccepting of our relationship.
i was cracking, my tough rough exterior was flaking away ever so slowly........
But unfortunately my horror didn’t stop, 2 car accidents wasnt enough, the universe had other ideas, the universe thought I could deal with MORE!!!
the weeks / months/ years that followed that day were full of things no one should ever have to go through.
It was three whole weeks before I got to have a shower But............
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